


eat your (colourful) heart out

by justanothernobody



Series: • d r a b b l e s • [5]
Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, K-pop
Genre: Based on a TV show, Crack Treated Seriously, Filming, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, and I have zero regrets, lapselock, srsly i rly just got zapped by inspo at 1 am for this, yoona as boa as minor characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 06:54:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19458706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanothernobody/pseuds/justanothernobody
Summary: on this episode of freaky eaters:man won’t eat anything other than rainbow sprinkles





	eat your (colourful) heart out

**Author's Note:**

> So uh... blame my past-midnight inspiration burst after watching this show called "Freaky Eaters" on Youtube by this channel called Tonic (this show was so real it's fake and I laughed way too much at it).
> 
> As always, enjoy!

“so _what_ exactly is my role, again?"

the producers give him a smile — fake, most probably — and repeats what he had said moments earlier.

"you're going to play the guy with an addiction to eating rainbow sprinkles."

changmin almost wants to bang his head onto the table. instead, he gives a tight-lipped smile.

"and _when_ am i getting the paycheck for it?"

"by the time we finish shooting the money's all yours, changmin-ssi. if you're willing to shoot some extra scenes we have in mind you will get a bonus too."

he closes his eyes, tells himself _it's all worth it_ a gazillion times, before saying, "yes," to the producers.

•••

he gets introduced to his partner the next day on the shoot.

she's a charming girl — her name was yoona, if he recalls — who is supposed to play the role of his concerned girlfriend. changmin wonders why she would even want this shabby role, when in fact k-dramas would kill for a face like hers to act in their series.

of course, the reason's money.

"believe me when i say that this pays twice more than what the average drama would usually," yoona tells him.

the directors call both of them on set — which is really just a suburban apartment room, mostly using in the kitchen and the dining and living room.

as he reads the script he's been given, changmin is barely unable to surpress a cringe.

"1, 2, 3, action!"

changmin puts on a serious face and recites his lines. "me and rainbow sprinkles, we're practically a match made in heaven."

•••

second day of shoot, changmin talks less and does more.

he watches yoona say, "my boyfriend, changmin, is a freaky eater," while giving himself a mental berating.

_you can do this, it's just some stupid thing to get over with. you can do this, you can do this, you can do this, you-_

"i can't fucking do this."

yoona overhears him as she passes by to get back on the waiting couch.

"c'mon changmin, a bit of embarrassment for lots of cash," she says with that knowing grin of hers.

when the cameras roll, he hides a wince by swallowing another spoonful of those diabetic rainbows.

•••

later that day, changmin basically gets filmed eating a spoon of rainbow sprinkles everywhere.

and that 'everywhere' — yeah, it's not an understatement.

he sits in the driver seat of a cheap van while eating sprinkles, he leans against the kitchen counter eating sprinkles, he even has to eat them with the lights off on a bed.

and those are just a few of the places he has to do so at.

changmin meets the other two stars in their shoot just after he swallows the last of his sprinkles.

he kinda wants to run into the centre of the earth so he can forget his crap of a first impression.

•••

for this scene, changmin and his 'girlfriend' has to pretend getting ready for a meal. then, the 'professional help duo' are going to enter and watch him refuse his dinner.

changmin only has a ton of regrets after having signed up for this.

as he and yoona sit across each other on the dining table, the door knocks. yoona gets there and welcomes the guests.

"hi! i'm kwon boa," changmin hears.

"yoona-ssi, nice to meet you. jung yunho," he hears again.

changmin stands up to greet them and introduce himslef to their guests.

as they shake hands jung yunho gives him a smile, and changmin feels a little bit wooed.

"i called doctor jung and doctor kwon to help with all the issues you've got, babe," yoona says.

if possible, changmin wants to shrivel into a ball and disappear right there and then.

as he sits down on his table watching yoona pick up a piece of fish with her chopsticks, changmin has to try and not drop the bit of sprinkle he's grabbing.

_ugh, why do i have to meet a cute guy in situations like these?_

•••

on the third day, they're shooting the shock therapy scene.

they shoot backyard today. greeting them is four large bags of — you guessed it — rainbow sprinkles.

"alright, changmin," boa starts, "we brought you here because we _really_ wanted to show you just how serious your problem is."

she hands him a bag of those colourful nightmares and he pretends to have a hard time handling it.

" _that's_ how much sprinkles you consume weekly. that's more than a hundred spoonfuls a _day_."

changmin covers his mouth in faux shock and internally bids his dignity _adios_.

but really, the worse has yet to come.

yunho leads them to a clearance and the first thing he sees is a gaping hole on the ground.

he points to the pit, "that, is where you'll end up if you don't change your eating habits."

yunho then points to some things on another table. he takes a red velvet box and gives it to him.

changmin's heart does some useless leap before remembering that he's _shooting goddamnit — a hottie isn't proposing to you, you dumbass._

"now put that box in the ground, since you'll be gone before you can even get engaged to your girlfriend."

changmin sort of tears up when he holds the box, all because he knows yunho will remember this moment and it's gonna ruin his image and his possible chance at dating him and-

"put this veil in the ground too, 'cause you wouldn't see your bride walking down the aisle."

he'd much rather put himself in that dirt and hopefully vanish.

•••

morning of the fourth day, he's supposed to attempt eating some vegetables.

"okay changmin, you're going to drop those chopsticks since you're so scared of anything other than sprinkles on there," the director commands.

all he manages is a grunt of regret and affirmation.

as boa and yunho watch him try to eat a small chunk of broccoli, changmin forcibly makes his fingers tremble to do what the director wants him to.

it was so effective that he ended up accidentally knocking a plate of vegetables down to the floor.

"outstanding job, changmin! you're a natural at this role," the director comments.

changmin stares at the broccoli on the floor. he really wants to be that broccoli right now and make sure none of the people — read: _yunho_ — in the room remember him like this only.

•••

noon, changmin's schedule told he'd be having a lunch date with yoona.

of course, not a normal lunch date. he's going to look like he's going to throw up when he tries to swallow some pasta.

and, again, of course yoona notices the way changmin tenses up when yunho steps into the room.

when he gags on the carbonara spaghetti he's eating — shame really, because carbonara is his absolute favourite — changmin tries not to let yunho see him act in such a miserable state.

what he didn't expect was for yunho to grin at him and compliment his brilliant acting skills later after the shoot's over.

yoona teases him about his teeny tiny crush on yunho the whole ride home.

•••

boa notices soon after.

and she isn't exactly the most patient woman, he discovers.

she and yoona team up to lock them in the waiting room in order to get them together.

"oh, the door's locked," yunho tells, a bit surprised. "do you have the key?"

_key to your heart_ , his mind unhelpfully supplies.

"but you already own it." said with a wink too. with a fucking deadly weapon called a _wink_.

changmin stutters in forming a reply. yunho walks over to him and he actually — oh god, he feels so _cheap_ for doing this — spreads his legs so yunho can hover close to him between them.

when yunho leans right over his face, breath mingling with changmin's own, he asks, "god, changmin, can i- can i kiss you?"

he wordlessly pushes his lips to yunho's as an answer.

those rainbow sprinkles rain down inside him — if it wasn't those, then what else could explain why his world just turned so bright and sweet and colourful?

when they part he hears yoona and boa cheering, "you go, boys!" right behind them. all yunho does is grab his face and kisses him silly all over again.

on the end of that day, he has a 150 million won paycheck _and_ a boyfriend in tow.

**Author's Note:**

> hit me up on twitter @[thirstvxq](https://twitter.com/thirstvxq)


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